Kneecap Chili at The CHILLYs 2013

One shot. And six pounds of brisket.

Ever since Shaw and I got shut out at the Kansas City Ad Club’s first CHILLYs, that cold winter’s eve has haunted us.

We made a damn fine pot of chili that night. I won’t go into my sour grapes here — but I will say that by the time the cook-off was over, we’d been completely cleaned out of chili. People liked it, but the deep pockets spending dollars on extra votes weren’t coming our way.

So for the second annual CHILLYs, we came at it hardcore.

Taco Bell Fiery Doritos Locos Taco

The heat is on for the DLT threequel.

As much as we love Taco Bell, it pains us to admit we were rather ambivalent to hear about the new Fiery Doritos Locos Taco ($1.39).

For one thing, we’ve never had the Flamas Doritos we’re told the shell of this taco is based on. Neither one of your Lunch Bloggers have bought Doritos with any regularity since college, and back then there were only two kinds -- regular Nacho Cheese and the girl flavor, Cool Ranch.

Plus, we’re skeptical about any fast food menu items that claim to be spicy, because they never are. We haven’t even mentioned yet this is the third Doritos Locos Taco the 'Bell has come up with, and threequels always blow.

Dunkin' Donuts Glazed Donut Breakfast Sandwich

America runs on Dunkin’, albeit gradually slower and slower.

The Dunkin’ Donuts Glazed Donut Breakfast Sandwich is a glazed donut split in half and topped with bacon and a fried egg. It launches nationwide today -- National Donut Day, no less. America, how has it taken us this long to make this sandwich a reality?

2013 Chef's Classic Knock OUT 'Bout

Who was the big winner? I’m pretty sure it was me.

As previously mentioned, Robert and I were invited to be judges at the second annual Chef’s Classic Knock OUT ‘Bout. Unfortunately, Robert had to bow out for a family thing, so I was left to represent Lunch Blog by myself. No worries, though. I showed up to the fight with my appetite, notebook and most severe judgy face -- excited to taste what the contenders brought this year.

Chef's Classic Knock OUT ‘Bout: THIS SATURDAY, April 13, 2013

Ready for a food fight?

The second Chef’s Classic Knock OUT ‘Bout is happening this weekend, and your Lunch Bloggers are excited to be judging the competition.

In the first two rounds of battle, local chefs will make appetizers and VIP ticketholders will cast votes for their favorite. Then the top two contenders will get in the ring for the mystery ingredient final round, judged by us, Kimberly Winter Stern and Missy Roe. The whole thing will be hosted by Stretch from Grinders.

Will Charles d’Albaing of Chaz on the Plaza defend his title? Will Brandon Winn of Room 39 make it to final round again? Or will there be two new competitors vying for the prize?

And most importantly, will there be a tie, forcing the opponents to actually put on up their gloves and box until one of them goes down?*

This is our second time as judges at the KOB, and we’re the only returning judges from the first year. It’s like we’re the Randy Jacksons of Kansas City food blogs.

The Knock OUT ‘Bout benefits St. Paul Catholic School. Tickets start at $25 and include food and drink, but with a VIP ticket you also get to sample and vote in the appetizer rounds. Check back here next week for a recap of all the action.

When: Saturday, April 13, 2013, with doors at 5:30 p.m.
Where: St. Thomas Aquinas High School, 11411 Pflumm Road, Overland Park, KS 66215

*This tiebreaker method isn’t in the rules. But it should be.

Coffee Ale, from Boulevard and The Roasterie

The new best part of waking up.

Coffee Ale combines two of my favorite things. First, coffee, which keeps me alert and provides me with the necessary will to live. Second, beer, which makes everything better, until it suddenly makes everything sad.

A collaboration between Boulevard Brewing Company and The Roasterie, the release of Coffee Ale seems to be relatively hype free. I was in and out of Cellar Rat with a few bottles this morning, no problem. As opposed to the Great Chocolate Ale Hunt of last year, which involved showing up at Lukas Liquor at 7 a.m., and even then not being the first person in line.

Taco Bell Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco

Old Man Hidden Valley must be spinning in his grave.

Taco Bell announced on Monday that its Facebook fans could get the Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco a day early. As we at Lunch Blog firmly believe in always living mas, we were happy to take them up on this exclusive offer. Besides, we didn’t want Taco Bell’s feelings to get hurt if none of its other 9,875,766 fans showed up.

Boxer Light & American

In the fight against good taste, these beers are the champs.

I’m a Yard Beer Anthropologist. Or I would be, if that was actually a thing and not something dumb I invented to justify my weakness for trying beers I should really know better about.

The latest two are Boxer Light and American. Before I came across them in the liquor store, I’d never heard of either one, but I was intrigued by both.

Red Balloon

You don’t have to be a regular to sing here, but it helps.

In search of some cheap eats and karaoke airtime, we did Guys’ Night at Red Balloon last month.

Alas, the karaoke was a bust. In our experience the KJ sang three out of every five numbers and called up the regulars before giving any new blood a shot. Fair enough -- your place, your rules.

Ophelia's Restaurant & Inn

Living large on a two-risotto night. 

Shaw and I were excited to attend Ophelia’s Restaurant & Inn last week for a sampling of Executive Chef Bobby Stearns’ new menu. Situated near the Jackson County Courthouse, as I drove past all the storefronts of the local shops and restaurants in Independence Square, I thought it might not be so bad to be called for jury duty. Except, of course, for the actual juroring.

Walking into Ophelia’s, I was shown to the bar and ordered a Manhattan. While sipping on my drink, I noticed a few of the other guests were having what I was told was a Yellow Cake Martini. Apparently it’s a house specialty, so maybe I should’ve tried that. But with its stark interior and dark wood, Ophelia’s strikes me as more of a classic cocktail kind of place.

Haus

Who’s haus? Bier’s haus.

A couple of months ago, a bunch of co-workers came back from having lunch at Haus and told me they’d just had the best fries ever. That’s right -- ever.

Clearly, I had to try these fries for myself, and while I don’t know if they’re the best, they are excellent. Haus somehow pulls off a crispy exterior with a chewy center, the result of a two-stage frying method involving a brine and possibly dark wizardry.